Saturday, February 18, 2012

really intersting stuff and total midlife babble

I can't tell you how interesting this story was to me. Interesting enough that I jumped out of the tub to share it. Okay, I didn't "jump" per say... that's kinda dangerous.
This story, for me, was about judging a human being as a human being (oh, we all judge, don't we?) and not as a religion or a color, which we are all so sick of. Injustice? yes. Lived and learned? Let's do. Please. And no human should expect any less from ANYONE EVER.
Then there's this... I'm fucking 40. 40! It's so cliche to question everything and lose your shit at 40. Don't forget to grow a ponytail, buy a sports car, get all zen and shit.
That's not exactly where I am... I think I did all that at 30, minus the ponytail plus one hot 21 year old plaything. I'm here. I'm half way through my life, IF I'm lucky enough to live to be 80. Cancer, car accidents, freak falls from odd places... all these punishments for whatever it is I think I did wrong.
So, now what? What the do I want to do? Having based my last 19 years on being a mother, I have no idea what else I want to do. I should say I have too many ideas. I have EVERY! Oh, 40... I thought you would just leave me the hell alone. Considering what I've been through so far, I feel like I've earned it.

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