I think I may be having some mid life "crisis".
I think about my own mortality all the time. What have I done in this life" If I get hit by a mack truck today, what will I be remembered by. My garlic dip? Shit. I've done nothing but make really good soup. Sure, I made three boys, but almost any uterus can do that! What they have become so far isn't something I can take 100% credit for. WE mold them, and they mold themselves.
Oh, god, I hate this kind of thinking. I laughed when my brother pierced his ear and bought a convertable mustang that his three kids barely fit into. He even grew a ponytail! I wonder what I will do...
For now, I'm in the over-thinking, sad stage. I'm in mourning for my youth. I can't believe I'm almost 40! What happened to my twenties? And my thirties are just racing by, too! Slow down!
When I was young, I thought that I would be above all this worrying. I would live forever and tomorrow would always be there. I miss that ignorance.